To Reason From Mystery

  

To Reason From Mystery

Let the quiet envelope me like velvet, like cream

          sometimes silence is my chosen sound

      revealing my confusion

          the offer to share

      my questions inquire

          which breaks the envelope

and I loose part of me once again

       A cosmic purple beckons

            my hearts desire

            for surrender, to be open

with eyes sober and ancient

          with smile unyielding

       how much do I really see

     the earth calls me

  the pull from standing to crawl

I roll in the imaginary leaves, snow, mud

     curl into myself like a tight fisted bud

then the call to rock gently

         until I open

I am the pebble tossing in the waves

         I am the ameba, worm, 

                 soft shelled crab

         the full impact of gravity pulls

            I am transforming

this is my calling

         it requires surrender and silence

Alchemy

Alchemy

Alchemy, from long ago

when rivers still innocently flowed,

when we still looked for philosopher's stone,

and if found,

what would be crawling under unearthed belly?

And those that whispered,

to the directions 4,

or listened to the hawk's wings,

for the right signs, for ingredients to be chosen,

to expose and delight in the elixir of life.

That is life's promise,

that resembles the wind,

that is the spark and that which gives the sparkle,

we might turn lead into gold and defy death's rattle.

The earth,

where the plant kingdom lives.

The air,

where our dreams compete with the clouds.

The sun shimmers and the moon glimmers,

and the sky is a canvas for the wind.

We did not discover fire, 

but learned to tame it, 

use it and fear it.

And the rain,

water is the gentlest of powerful substances, 

it carves rock and mountain tops, 

washes wounds and baths and baptizes and bubbles and froths and freezes and quenches.

Dry like the desert, 

moist like a coffee cake 

hot like a frying pan 

cold like a serial killer. 

If only we were magicians or there was magic, 

ah the thought of miracles: 

that one form of matter, 

no matter what its make-up, 

could be changed into another. 

That with our might and hubris blind delight

We could alter the proportions from tall to small or 

long to short or 

tiny to extravagant.

In the end you are my alchemy, 

you stop my thirst, 

from small to large, 

If love is a fabric of the universe,

and if the universe is really infinity,

then our love will live forever on this plain or that other realm 

and you are my elixir.

Spark

Spark by Carrie Katz 2011

I praise the spark

I ignite the spark

I cause it

I look out the window

I carry the spark

I touch the cool wall

Its strength can scare me

so I make a tentative approach

a gentle tap

I am the spark,

Solitary I reach out

There is a space between the idea and the intention

I call across the chasm

There is silence

Why don’t they come now?

Light up my life

The energy expands my center

My seeds are dwindling, dwindling

My seed are unfertilized, sterile

Only half of what’s needed and then they wash away

First they spiral then they dance.

Drop by drop,

they lie suspended.

My middle is expanding, my digestion is failing, my sleep is waning, my complexions is greening, my memory is fleeting and my Spark is waiting for my Love

I’m here, by the way. Come.

We’ll start with a tea, a walk,

Hold my hand, my fingers like dry kindling

I am ready like a light switch, ready for the light

I am ready, like a candlewick, ready for the flame

I am ready, like shore, accepting and expecting the waves

I am ready, like a pillow, a soft place to rest your head

I am ready, like my shoes, the right fit, the chance to transit

I am ready, like a book, to be opened and read

I am ready like Thahir Square, for spring, for dignity, for freedom

I am ready.

The human spirit leaves as we die

But it never dies

Esoteric mystic, geometric, generic

We are all portals

Each generation relinquishes the truth!

I love you, I always will, I always do, I love you now, like I loved you before, before time. I call you, and this whisper floats above the city, above the land, free.

You can be a witness, and I can be a dancer

You can be a swimmer and I can be the current

You can be the song and I can be the strings

You can be the cave and I can carry the spark

I am brave enough now, all I need to do is agree, take the chance,

be the person I am meant to be,

like feet across a carpeted room, the potential for a spark

Like an open window in the deep dark of winter’s night

You can be the breeze gentle against my curtain

Like my patience sitting on my kitchen chair, you can be my sustenance

I invite you to make a choice, and choose the light, and take the flight

And call me by my many names

This one, this life is all I have right now.

You may know more and I know less than before.

My love for you ,calls for you, across the space

that looks like an ocean

that feels like a time zone

that requires a faith that once the spark ignites

it can be kept, cuddled, harnessed, protected, enriched, enhanced, replenished, supported, praised, fed and rested.

That tiny spark needs to be nurtured, because without it

The fridge light would be burnt

and the toilette wouldn’t flush

and the shower wouldn’t cleanse our bodies, our souls

Love, I wait for you

Spark

Invoke you,

You just need to decide the timing is right

Right now.

Return of the Barnicle

Barnicle: 

Common name of sedentary crustacean animals constituting the subclass Cirripedia.

                                        

You are lost, in a puddle

of self sacrifice, of self sabotage,

of insecurities as large as

an asteroid crater

Your self respect lies

Like road kill, on a busy highway

How I want to shake you

Believe in you

Shine you up

like Aladdin's Lamp

Release the Ginny so that

You can manifest magic

Your eyes so warm

Your eyes so sad

You have forgotten how accept love

Even when it stares you right in the face

You have neglected yourself

and your kids suffer

Fear, I wish I could take a washcloth

Warm and wet and wipe this away with gentle strokes

It is pity, I want sexy

I want to see you in your dignity

to own it, like a fire hydrant

on a sweltering day

Quenching the parched pavement, putting out the fires

You want to to do good,

be good, be kind be a spark

I can't save you from this need

that is larger then a Christmas float in November

How can you so repel me

and reel me in like the moon's drag on earth's shore

like inhaling a cigarette

Like a vacuum cleaner hose

Can it be, you are not thinking as much as

feeling, needing, fumbling

Yet you call those thoughts

And I am affected

If only I say the right things

You will shine, you will soar

you will heal.

I am still not sure

what you want and don't want

From me, form life

And why I care so much

As if you sitting

on a park bench

Alone, in the fall

And everything around you

is grey and brown.

what I learnt from a breast cancer scare

It left me fragile

vulnerable

there is a cost to being strong

I found it hard to reach out

ask for support

I am aware, some support

is toxic

it's hard to know what or who

won't be 'helpful'

even when they don't mean it

I fond my heart

now it feels, awakened

it's looking for a mate

but not while this was going on

not until the need was unleashed

my desirability

became a question

rebalancing that

become

my center

I hate worrying my friends and family

I preferred keeping this to myself

but the affect of that was

painful for them

What I learnt from a breast cancer scare;

I'm not willing to give up on my dreams

it brought out the warrior in me

the fighter

What I learnt from a breast cancer scare;

I am open to love now

I am a warrior for my dreams

It is the gift

I am cancer free

Dark Daffodils

Dark Daffodils

are shutting the door

to say goodbye

forever more

to darkness

from far away

I hear the call

you are the one

my wonder all

consuming, distracting,

enveloping

I dust my shelves

my books I straighten

My clothes I fold

I am not mistaken

the place where I feel you

lies in the center of my being

by inspiration, I am caught cleaning

To call you forth

to conjure you to me

For ever more, as always

yours

Time dilates, I radiate

I walk about, without a doubt

I'm over here, you're under there

Love is a concept, I breath and stare

at springs renewal

the birds song

of southern cold winds

your head rings

I am waiting, still waiting

For you

I cannot say goodbye

I cannot stop this

I swim in the ocean of your essence

I am helplessly lost, imagining your lips

forever more, as always

yours

This bliss is painfully close to the matter

This call is like madness, to love, not to spatter

to trust what's in front

not plan

not falter

our guides tell us it matters

to climb the ladder

for love

cross the oceans

for love

clean the mess, do your taxes, make the bed

for love

for ever more, as always

yours.

You Have to Feed the Fish

You Have to Feed the Fish

My heart is landing somewhere

I am listening to the walls

So I float through a door

in my search

what are the whispers saying?

I am adrift on this raft, out at sea

so alone, so isolated, without comfort,

Will I find the port in the storm

match the missing mitten on a cold day

remember the galoshes or the muddy puddles

I have an intense hunger

it says,

You have to feed the fish, you have to water the plants.

The alarm goes off and one can press reset

sleep a little longer,

but in the end you get up to face the day, when

your love has flown its migratory path half way around the world it needs to rest,

it needs a soft landing.

It wants to exhale,

to build a home,

every twig of experience gathered with care

Finding the right tree,

singing a duet to greet the morning sky

nurturing enough to perch perfectly and see past the trees

I need to go into the place

where I dismantle the need

find that place

Find the power

You're controlling it and I exclaim:

Are you kidding me?

I am a tropical fish

delicate but sturdy

I need constant flow, a soft current

I need warm waters and food and care

Fed by your gentle fingers, gentle, strong, consistent

How could I loose something I never really had

as I reach out,

I don't want it to slip though those fingers

meant for touching, caressing

I hold onto the idea,

but watch the space begin to grow, neglect

stretching the nuances, a distraction

like the drilling bit lost in the concrete

fantasy, of the You and the I finding each other

I'm lucky to feel this love, I'm lucky

to feel anything

really. I want you to explore the

terrain of my heart and plant your flag,

and stake a claim, pierce

me, possess me, then tether me and

I will always find my

way back home.